The leadership myth that’s keeping you stuck

If you’ve ever thought…I just need to prove I can do more at this level, and then I’ll be seen as a leader. You’re not the only one, and that's probably keeping you stuck!

I see this all the time in brilliant HR women: you’re doing the work, giving your all, and hoping someone senior finally notices.

But let’s be honest, how often does that actually happen?

Here’s the truth:

You don’t get seen as a leader because you do more.You get seen as a leader when you show up differently.

And I don’t mean louder, pushier or someone you’re not.I mean owning your judgment. Speaking with intention. Asking better questions.Choosing where your time and energy go, instead of being pulled into everything.

That’s the real shift.It’s not about getting better at the doing.It’s about stepping into the thinking.

And I know that’s easier said than done when your day is full of other people’s priorities, political curveballs and the expectation that you’ll just get on with it (without making a fuss).

But here’s where you start:

1. Shift your measure of success. Stop counting how much you’ve done.Start asking: What changed because I was involved?Impact, not volume.

2. Let go of the ‘fix it first’ instinct. You’re not the glue for everything that’s broken.Try stepping back. Let someone else fill the silence.

See what you notice.

3. Use your voice with intention. Not more, just better.When you speak, speak from insight, not overload.Be the one who sees the pattern, not just the tasks.

💭 Here’s a thought to sit with this week: Where might your need to prove yourself actually be hiding your potential to lead differently?

It’s a subtle shift, but a powerful one—because proving tends to come from fear, while leading differently comes from trust. One keeps you reacting, the other helps you rise above the noise.

So this week, catch yourself in the moments where you automatically say yes, jump in to fix something, or over-explain your thinking. Pause. Ask yourself:What would it look like to back my expertise here, not defend it?

That’s where things start to change.